You shine so bright it's insane,
You put the Sun to shame.



I'm still alive but I'm barely breathing

I want the real reason.

Reminder

9459 7711 - Jellyhearts for Pearl
Wish G Happy Birthday

Tmrw movies with Tan
Wed to Andss for CNY (Ask Jnrs matches when)


People today said I have nice complexion and look like a mixed blood girl. (HAPPY FACE HAHA)

OMG OMG OMG

Jaslyn Quek
Omg I gonna go Chingay. Got release of Kong Ming Lanterns. List of Things I want to Do 101
4 hours ago · Friends Only ·Like Unlike · Comment

ATE AT EMPIRE STATE @ ILUMA







In the end, everyone loses everyone. There was no invention to get around that, and so I felt, that night,like the turtle that everything else in the universe was on top of.

Things I will look forward to

1. Dye my hair dark brown
2. Go for a manicure (anyway Cny's coming!)
3. Spend all my money on things I wanna buy although I know saving is a virtue because I am going to
4. Work (Constant job = more $$)
5. Getting a laptop for poly
6. More clothes cuz poly doesn't have school uniform
7. Get sandals/flats something that can be worn with a handbag/dress cuz I only have vans
8. Get a new dark blue bag with gold zippers or something
9. Read more books!

OKAY QUITE SHALLOW LIKE I SHOULD HAVE 9. Learn a new skill 10. Read up on my course but no I am not like that hahahaha. My points are basically shopping, I realise.

However if I make it into Jc which I think is of a lower percentage then,

1. Buy Mizuno kneeguards
2. Buy asics court shoes
3. Get to wear school uniform!
4. School environment, I likeeee
5. Have volleyball to play
6. No adult fare! + Student meals!
7. Can muggggggg
8. Easier to make it into University
9. SAVE MONEYYYYY

No I is not sad la I is happy I happy like this 'lil boy boy herez he look happy with a bread see over here below do not worry friendz xx



I realise my url is my name spelt backwards, that's so passe. (SO OUT ALREADY HAHAHAHHA) I remember I was impressed with the people who could figure out where it was derived from, so silly we were then. Easily impressed, but easily happy. X

Agreed

“So avoid using the word ‘very’ because it’s lazy. A man is not very tired, he is exhausted. Don’t use very sad, use morose. Language was invented for one reason, boys - to woo women - and, in that endeavor, laziness will not do. It also won’t do in your essays.”

— John Keating, Dead Poet’s Society

I'm past caring

I ain't gonna go to you, any of you anymore, you just come to me when you need me, it's here I will be.

Funny how gravity roots us to the ground, yet holds nothing more than physical things.
What about heartbreaks, what about our dreams? What about directions, what about our thoughts that drift?
Now we stand and wonder if they are just non-existent things.


I loved you with a fire red, now it's turning blue
You said sorry like an angel, Heaven let me think was you

-

I don't understand so many things

Clare, it was beyond telling, to come as though from death to hold you, and to see the years all present in your face. I won't tell you anymore, so you can imagine it, so you can have it unrehearsed when the time comes, as it will, as it does come. We will see each other again, Clare. Until then, live, fully, present in the world, which is so beautiful. It's dark, now, and I am very tired. I love you, always. Time is nothing.

Love, Henry

-


Books have this thing about making English powerful for a few days, then it slips away 'cos words are forgotten. I get so absorbed sometimes pulling the stories out into life. Then again, stories are from life.

Tell me what you want to hear


This. And Belle of the Boulevard acoustic by Dashboard Confessional is making me miss Cameron Highlands.
Back then we were still so worried about results and everything and look at us now, all on our way to tertiary education, where ever it is going to bring us. We weren't totally at peace with ourselves and the overwhelming load of expectations we carried wouldn't be what the perfect getaway should include, but we were happy. And we knew at least, for those 4 days we could put everything down. The work, people, emotions, weather, all here stuck in Sg hehe. It is damn carefree the feeling I want to whisk every single student off to Cameron right now.

Wow blogging late into the night/day rocks. Okay digress. Okay I really need to stop playing minesweeper on msn so I can concentrate on blogging properly I like all the feelings coming out in words. Okay wait.

-

I don't know what I'm doing. 'Cept to study hard for the subjects I don't even know yet I have no directions in anything I'm doing now. I guess it's the same for most of us. I am mixed up, confusing all my inner thoughts with all the rights and wrongs, actions and words. For the superficiality this world only sees it gets pretty hard to keep up with the pacing of everyone else's footsteps. You know the feeling you give and give and feel foolish but there's just this wall around the person you are trying to get to, and they don't get a single thing at all. And there you are wishing hard, hoping for the best to come to everyone for the best we want for ourselves, we want for the people dear to us as well. Yet they don't get it, things are taken for granted and on one side you are left high and dry and on the other side it gradually becomes a common sight to them, you pleading and praying so hard people actually get it but no, you are just in your own world, screaming silence for no one to hear. Bouts of struggles, we all go through them, though. It's nothing much, you think one day and another day the very same reason can shred your day in seconds when it just occurs to you all of a sudden.

It's unfair, isn't it? How we have to understand, time and again, taking and taking things in. Each time we adjust ourselves to our new selfs and we fill and fill this jar of understanding until it's up till the brim, on the brink of overflowing into a puddle of regret, guilt. No sun will evaporate your fears and take it all away, the murky waters will just seep into the ground and there it is stored away again at some other place. You seem all needed at once and then in a flash, redundant. People go to each other only if they need something. Here we are, living to feed each others needs and if you aren't needed you are stashed away some place until you are needed again. If you dare speak up your own needs, you will be denied, the need satisfied is nothing but the shame burning bright under your translucent skin and again, you are exposed -- bare in the flesh.

What's right, and what's wrong? It's just a matter of perspectives and which side garners popularity. It should not be such, but reality and society is such. Whatever majority deem acceptable is right. That way, what can we really make out of right from wrong? People at least are wrong in a way, I am wrong in so many ways. If nobody cares anyway how does it really matter doing things for the sake of nothing. Wash hands off things, off people.
Do you know where your heart is?
Do you think you can find it?
Or did you trade it for something
Somewhere better just to have it?
Do you know where your love is?
Do you think that you lost it?
You felt it so strong, but
Nothing's turned out how you wanted

Well, bless my soul
You're a lonely soul
Cause you won't let go
Of anything you hold

Do you know what your fate is?
And are you trying to shake it?
You're doing your best and
Your best look
You're praying that you make it

What did I do, where did I go wrong

What do you want, jaslyn quek

Everything rushes by without a second glance

There's nothing wrong with not being sad. It's just, sometimes it gets kind of bad. A jar full of fallen hopes, plummeting down like heavy snow. It's blowing gales outside and it seems like there's no stopping tonight. Things change, and we are figuring out where to go from here, all the time.

It takes so less for people to fall apart but so much to get themselves together. It takes so less for people to be at odds with each other but so much to see each other through things, to look through things which are crucial, but transparent to most people around. But people fear, and fear is the heart of love. Fear and courage contradict, never will they run in tandem. When these very things run into each other at different frequencies, things just freeze over. Die. Sad as death.

Eat: Spicy Potato Chips and Chewy Junior
just in case I forget to eat before reading Time Traveller's wife. I know, I know I've been at it for months now.

This could be the end of everything, so why don't we go somewhere only we know
Let's leave those things to tomorrow.
释怀说了太多就成真不了
也许时间是一种解药
也是我现在正服下的毒药
看不见你的笑我怎么睡得着
你的身影这么近我却抱不到

-

刮风这天 我试过握着你手
但偏偏 雨渐渐 大到我看你不见
还要多久 我才能在你身边
等待放晴的那天 也许我会比较好一点
从前从前 有个人爱你很久
但偏偏 风渐渐
把距离吹得好远
好不容易 又能再多爱一天
但故事的最后你好像还是说了拜拜
Note: Buy mummy's ring I lost and go steamboat :D

I like that this is something in Singapore. It seems more achievable and real, like not too faraway.
http://jamesbent.com
La Mode Outre.
No more lives torn apart,
That wars would never start,
And time would heal all hearts.
And everyone would have a friend,
And right would always win,
And love would never end.

I'd put a flower in your hair

I didn't madly love cats nor kittens but...

THIS is so cute hehe. Pantat class kitty

-





I knew the pathway like the back of my hand
Everything that I could give is everything you couldnt take

I keep a sinister smile and a hole in my heart




I like the esplanade underpass' mini exhibition lane




Before coundown, they had to test the foam machines and WE WERE THERE MUAHAHAHAHA


So cute the adidas shoe has got a ribbon!




Kraze's awesome burgurs


Tim went to skate with me at the lousy mbs which is plastic with oil eweww.


Doggy in pram I saw with Pei on Christmas.

My ducky float ring with an umbrella, Pei's double ring


Aww, I love notes.

So, I bought a toothbrush holder cos gooey black stuff forms at the bottom of toothbrushes when it's wet. I happily wrote this and got Pearl scared and annoyed when she opened it and there was a cockroach in there Ba Dum. WHAT AN IRONY.






Oh hai this was new year's day hehe I spent it with my dearest family. My granny is so cute ikr. Look at her on the playground seat. And that's us trying to balance on two closed feet while hunching. I could do it perfectly Idk why some can't. And we went back to childhood blowing bubbles and I used to blow up like, 4 with 1 tiny tube and my cousin taught me to use one per tube resulting in big bubbles/balloons. Look ew, there's my saliva in one of 'em. Talking about old people! This old cute uncle neighbour fell this afternoon because it was raining and his feet and face were bleeding. He walks his dog and asks it to say hi to us so cute. And he takes his grandson down. My sis and I greet him, I can't imagine one day when these old people hold their funerals at our very void decks, sad notion, but reality in its truest form.

I can't wait for school to start

Hi,
I want to put Hwachong and Raffles are my last two choices I think I am trying to be funny but it's quite fun and I don't know what to put below anymore haha. No more looking back, no more listening to people who say you cant cos time to put your best foot forward and show that you want it and that you can and now its the table and chair and book and you. I wield my pen as my sword now. I can't wait for school no matter what the posting results are. Go Jaslyn!
I need positive energy.
I think Bonus points are shit.
I want to study stop labelling me/telling me all the school norms. Damn. They don't matter if you wanna study right. Right?
I was really mad and affected when my sis made a passing comment she didn't like Anderson, Boo
I see the words business and entrepreneur and set up a company and I'm like no no no I'll go sit down and study

Things that irk me sometimes about myself
1. Fickle
I need to be decisive and sure of the things that I want.
2. How I am amused by little things
I think I am overly excited sometimes.
3. How I laugh like mad and can't stop laughing
But I am just happy.
4. To stop using smiley faces but I still do sometimes
I don't like they are damn act cute but I need to express myself sometimes, or seem like a nicer person ha.
5. The vulgarities I am attached to
I need to express myself sometimes but this can be kept to a minimal
6. The Bimboness
I will cut down hahahahahahahaha Eh I am quite hardy lo where got bimbo

For selfish gains

I DONT KNOW WHAT I'M THINKING EITHER HI

Hi My grades are a great improvement yet not very good for O level standards. Not very good yet not very horrendous either. I think it's worse to be unable to decide between poly/jc than which jc to go to. And the poly courses are astounding. Yet the right ones you dont know where it'll bring you or if you'll not want that path in the future or the school is too far. But then again everywhere is too far except SA and NY and I have set on SA for so long and now then I realise NY isn't that far from my place either but when I flip the book I realise I am eligible for CJ but it's so far haha. But then it's the worst not to be able to be admitted anywhere, ain't it.

Crux of this whole issue is, I think everyone is just too caught up with their own self and future to really look around and care for the people who didn't do that well. Who is going to care for 5N who didn't do well and the express people who did badly although I dont know who even though express surpassed many batches in math and sciences (Oh I am proud of our thoughttobelousy and Mrs Pohs last batch but did the best in these years batch I must say, we don't have top scorers but we performed above average as a whole hehe) while people are posting what they don't know to do with themselves with their amazing Os results. Themselves themselves, everyone only has themselves. We live such a conflicting world.

I just don't think some things have to be made public sometimes.
these feelings are just buried in my heart now its not gone its still there WHY YOU NEVER FIGHT FOR ME MORE I'D TAKE YOU BACK I fought. I fought. I fucking Fought. Fight harder. You know how I withdraw when it comes to affairs of the heart. Save me fight like how i fought for you back then im feeling what you felt dig me out of my grave. I dont want relationship anymore so you dont need to know thanks for fighting so hard for me sorry i cant fight back for you much as I would like to cos youve come clean with me your real feelings I NEED TO HEAR too late now I cant bring myself to save you.

Love is bullshit

I got so much to say I forgot what to say I am lazy to pour my heart out here fuck it fuck it I've been through this shit. I'VE FUCKING BEEN HERE.

The higher your hopes the harder you fall so they say. So afraid of falling I haven't any hopes for myself anymore now I feel like a piece of underachieving shit. Dirtbag.

Upload Photos

Dont be lazy. Upload photos. Upload photos.

Maybe it's just the sound of wind hitting our broken strings


Hello cutiepie!

-


Waves or

Curls or

Boycut?

" The people that you can’t live without can live without you. "

I don't like to be fangirly but he's hot




Forbidden fruit is the sweetest



Pretty awesome hahaha.
Back from chalet Woo hoo I am in PE and going back to schooooooooooooooool. Hidhir the yazid created oh anderson sick (OAS) 2010 group on fb everybod go join. So hair pee going to school hehe.

Oh I suddenly thought of this. I am in Band 3 English from Band 1 English because I failed 2 tests accidentally. And if the teachers do what they did to us to our juniors, flashing the entire cohort in their respective bands, OMG EVERYONE WILL SEE THAT I AM IN BAND 3. So sad. Juniors spread that my English is good I bribe you with sweets. HAHA MY FRIENDS ALL SAY I IN DENIAL. But I must say my English deproved alot. hoo hoo.

-

Don't we keep going back to the wrong things. Don't we always go back to the very things that make us lose our ground. Things that destroy, things that shouldn't be, always have their way of grabbing us at breakneck speed, sucking us all into an endless black hole.

note to self: check up poly courses

Paperbacks to e-books. Letters to emails. Photographs to online files. Isn't everything more substantial and real in hard copies. I think things are put across more sincerely this way. And they can be kept, it's like Something.

I like my hair not straight now. Just keept tying buns everyday. Wheeheeeee curly wavy messy hair. My hair is long now I will curl it/cut it super short. Changes, how exciting. Yet the very thing people dread depending on time and place.


The lady sat by the window sill with decadence, lost in her own reverie, her hair coiffed in a neat low chignon.
Oh golly, she's going to the party sans gentlemen tonight.


Alright ciao Chalet woohoo second chalet and one more after results. Being a lazy bum I havent uploaded any photos. There are alot of things after results. Build a aunty huang bear and chalet and giggang outing and primary school clique outing and the Valentino Retrospective (A gown exhibition) but will I have the mood after I face my grades hoo hoo. Then again, good or bad life goes on. Desirable or not Imma continue schooling. Why mope at home when you have to spend life anyway?

So, impossible as it may seem
You've got to fight for every dream
Cos who's to know which one you let go
Would have made you complete

School

Everyones saying how much they love anderson.
I think it's the people, not the place which make things worthwhile for everyone. But still you'd think how you may be if you hadn't been in the places with the choices you made. I hope things would go on -- our kelly blue tunic, the once an andersonian always and andersonian spirit, our play culture but still managing to keep up with schoolwork attitude, how we rise to the occassion.

Omg I realise we're in oas already. Officially Anderson Sick. Or something like that, the seniors made it up last year I forgot what haha d'oh
SAY GOODBYE TO MY HEART TONIGHT

Applies to everyone. Sad or not

Its a plague, this constant weight, it haunts my thoughts when you're away.
And would it be safe for one to say, I made your heart smile at the end of the day?

And what, what was hidden behind your smile?
Was it love, or pain in disguise?
I know my love never took that away,
I know my love was just a plague.

With everyday I pray you'd say I brought you joy in some way.
But that's not the case, cause I took it away, I turned your joy into pain.
I know my songs were never profound, they were never sincere enough to make your heart sing out.
So where am i wrong, in hoping that I might someday realize where I was all along?

where I was all along

and what, what was hidden behind your eyes?
was it love, or pain in disguise?
I know my love never took that away.
I know my love was just a plague.
I got nine mosquito bites on the same area on my poor leg cos i sat on a pile of red ants in my beach shorts. Just saying

This is not a love story. This is a story about love.

Hello.

Does texting without smileys and stuff seem rude and unfriendly? Not really right, if you can express yourself properly. And your complete thought seems more full, more thought through more matured. But wow a smiley really does wonders I gotta admit, maybe people reading texts should just stop reading too much into a bunch of words.

Okay seems like I have started rambling, and YES I feel like cooking up a storm of a story about all I have to say I have so much to say I always have alot to say when you put me alone for a while or when like, a milestone has happened but no milestone has happened and school is starting tomorrow for the little ones and everyone is back from their holidays but I am uneventful and havent been anywhere or done anything meaningful. I feel sore. A little.

Talking about milestones, people get like, famous, or if not along that line then at least at around this age I am people who make it big or successful people know what they wanna do and start working on it and it'll become thrie forte in the future, something you see them with awe about and I do somehow feel conscious I don't seem to be anywhere near all those dreams, goals nor aspirations. But that isn't much to worry about, just take little steps and study hard first, right? Yet the adult world, one we're entering soon is pretty overwhelming. Adapting and adjustments are crucial for new environments and hopefully the comfortable background of friends will still be there for us to camouflage in. Yet who will you hold on to and how do you know if the same people would hold on to you? So they say life is unpredictable and we walk on, sure we do, but at times things slip away. Friendships will never be the same, the time people are able to fork out for each other, more people who enter your life you unknowingly exchange your past friends for.

People are posting the ages they are going to be this 2011. Then I realise Hello, I am 17 this year. 17 is a nice number. So is 11. So it's gonna be 17 in the year 11. I'm pretty excited. I can't wait for school to start, like I've mentioned (I think). I'm hyped to start school, it's like more brand new than any other brand news. Gosh, 17 seems a little old already. My mummy asked me what if I get bad grades and can't even enter the poly course I want. Then I guess I'll have to make do with any course I can enter and study really hard because it is payback for not putting in that effort earlier. Even if it's not the way out you want, it is a way out. Take it or leave it and I'll take it. It's like watching the Channel u show just now. The needy take things from the donors and they thank and thank and are so grateful but when they are offered jobs by the programme, they turn it down citing health problems. I remember feeling disgusted because, just because you get help you just keep taking that help? No, that's not the way. Why didn't they just take that goddamned job and lead a better life and appease me huh! What's the use of thanking and thanking and giving grateful speeches when you don't put in effort yourself. What's the point.

Anyway now I look and young couples and get an odd feeling. Like they are weird, all of them. It's like, hey little people, stop being silly. You'll round up breaking up. That, or you're gonna hurt each other really bad. If you that's what you want, go go for it. I hope you learn well. If not eat this, nothing lasts. Not at our age, with our maturity. I mean, of course some people go far. But most think they are matured enough, yet when we look back we are always once too young. How old is old enough? Do all we have to do, sure, if not now then when? We may not have the chance to when we grow too old.

Tired, and talking to pstan hahahahaha. There's something with when you let your words flow on one end it would cease on the other right. It's always like that for me okay ciao

Not all things that are built to last will last