Amazing camp, npsu foc 2011 Pantheon, Catequil, Obsessio!
HAHAHAHHAHA KILL 'EM
What are words if you really don't mean them when you say them
What are words if they're only for good times then they're gone
Can't take this song, it's so beautifully sad. Makes me think of how I am treating people around me, just doing everything to suit myself and make myself feel sufficient. Make myself feel good, how I cast aside fears and messed up thoughts of my own only to sacrifice another persons'. And just in that moment of folly, how that would turn into you'd come to regret, that knots me up in the stomach.
It's really horrible how anger, jealousy, greed, all these feelings in Pandora's box, cliched as they may seem, can put someone into such a wreck. In that moment, you can forsake friendship, trust, belief for things that you feel are unjustly snatched away from you.
I don't want to give up on or lose things and people in this manner. It's really not worth it.
-
No need for lies or explanations. I know what you mean. I know what you want. From me, and me only. No in the exclusive way, but in a way you can't get from others and in a way that no one knows. The way dirty linen works.
What really defines a fault? Is is something socially unaccepted or what others perceive you to be? And if you've done something wrong, what's the right thing to do? Tell everyone, is that considered shame or coming clean, washing off your sins? Is is keeping it in for yourself to know and not letting it on a soul and not doing it again, and if you do do it again, are you at fault? Are you at fault for going against your principles or not simply because no one knows? And if you stop doing it nothing is really different so if you stop it are you really salvaging anything? But a fault is a fault and there isn't sch a thing as undoing it. Do you keep it in and kill yourself bit by bit inside of you silently or spill the beans and risk a reputation and a person's trust? And then there's always that bit to keep going at it for forbidden fruit is the sweetest and nothing is clear and that it'll always be in the dark if no one lets the cat out of the bag and that people are easy and that with experience comes familiarity. I don't think I will wash myself clean, I'm staying away at my best. Abstinence, they say. Moral grey areas wash over people. Logic makes no sense.
Go back to the past, haunting days.
It's really horrible how anger, jealousy, greed, all these feelings in Pandora's box, cliched as they may seem, can put someone into such a wreck. In that moment, you can forsake friendship, trust, belief for things that you feel are unjustly snatched away from you.
I don't want to give up on or lose things and people in this manner. It's really not worth it.
-
No need for lies or explanations. I know what you mean. I know what you want. From me, and me only. No in the exclusive way, but in a way you can't get from others and in a way that no one knows. The way dirty linen works.
What really defines a fault? Is is something socially unaccepted or what others perceive you to be? And if you've done something wrong, what's the right thing to do? Tell everyone, is that considered shame or coming clean, washing off your sins? Is is keeping it in for yourself to know and not letting it on a soul and not doing it again, and if you do do it again, are you at fault? Are you at fault for going against your principles or not simply because no one knows? And if you stop doing it nothing is really different so if you stop it are you really salvaging anything? But a fault is a fault and there isn't sch a thing as undoing it. Do you keep it in and kill yourself bit by bit inside of you silently or spill the beans and risk a reputation and a person's trust? And then there's always that bit to keep going at it for forbidden fruit is the sweetest and nothing is clear and that it'll always be in the dark if no one lets the cat out of the bag and that people are easy and that with experience comes familiarity. I don't think I will wash myself clean, I'm staying away at my best. Abstinence, they say. Moral grey areas wash over people. Logic makes no sense.
Go back to the past, haunting days.
It's weird
How when people say sorry the thing doesn't matter anymore but if they didn't say it you'll be really mad
How when you get dumped and when you are the dumper and the result is the same but you don't feel as sad
How one night can change everything, you turn around and everything is just different
How when you get dumped and when you are the dumper and the result is the same but you don't feel as sad
How one night can change everything, you turn around and everything is just different
how do you let go of what you let in
F A C E B O O K X I A L A N
Hell is empty and all the devils are here.
You're gonna catch a cold from the ice inside your soul.
I love lit But I don't have lit in poly. ):
Let's face the fact that we don't really mean much to people as they mean to us, and we don't value other people for how much they value us either. It's funny how all these random thoughts throughout the day string together in my dreams. A thought here, a memory there, a fleeting sight I caught. (HIMYM: This moment is fleeting because it is chased by another moment HAHAHAHAH) I want to throw everything away poly life please come swallow me whole thanks x
How I met your mother is funny but I don't laugh much watching it after the first season/alone. I like how they can be so open and frank to each other and everything's still cool and they way they converse and bring thoughts across to each other. I don't like how they perceive everything the people in the clique do to be okay even though some things they do are blatantly wrong. Why hasn't Barney gotten an STD?
With time,
things will fade away. Things you put alot of feelings and effort into will be nothing in your life in the future. So don't mull over things, it's just gonna be pieces of the past. Funny how people and connections works, though. Humans are one of the most horribly complicated things on Earth.
How can you expect people by your side when you don't want them in your life.
Gah I can't wait for poly to start. You guys are driving me nuts.
I MISS MY PULLOVER ):
Long were the nights when my days once revolved around you
Counting my footsteps, praying the floor won't fall through
You paint me a blue sky and go back and turn it to rain
Well maybe it's me and my blind optimism to blame
Maybe it's you and you're sick need to give love and take it away
And you'll add my name to your long list of traitors who don't understand
And I'll look back and regret how I ignored when they said run as fast as you can
your dark twisted games You are an expert at "sorry" And keeping lines blurry
But I took your matches before fire could catch me
I'm shining like fireworks over your sad empty town
How can you expect people by your side when you don't want them in your life.
Gah I can't wait for poly to start. You guys are driving me nuts.
I MISS MY PULLOVER ):
Long were the nights when my days once revolved around you
Counting my footsteps, praying the floor won't fall through
You paint me a blue sky and go back and turn it to rain
Well maybe it's me and my blind optimism to blame
Maybe it's you and you're sick need to give love and take it away
And you'll add my name to your long list of traitors who don't understand
And I'll look back and regret how I ignored when they said run as fast as you can
your dark twisted games You are an expert at "sorry" And keeping lines blurry
But I took your matches before fire could catch me
I'm shining like fireworks over your sad empty town
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