Maybe I only have myself to blame all along, to keep things close when you can't have it. Which is selfish. And wrong. And misleading. And confusing. Mind over matter in this case, it's not even what I want! So what's gotten into me. Reminder to self not to commit actions which are just easy ways out of a situation, or to ease current emotions. Remember to consider others' feelings, that effects always have a cause and that boredom or the crave for instant gratification is never an acceptable excuse to mislead others.